Choosing to be Angry

This week I read a talk by Elder Lynn G. Robbins titled "Agency and Anger." It was a really great read and it really gave me a new understanding of just how much control we have over our emotions! We all have free agency and can make our own choices, and some of those choices include how we react emotionally to others or events in our lives. I definitely needed this reminder: that I can choose my emotional response. 

What was a really interesting point made in this talk was that we naturally have more control over our reactions and feelings in some situations compared to others. The point is made in the article that those reactions are learned behaviors - for example in the workplace we have a much higher tolerance and are very slow to anger. Obviously this is an important reaction that we have learned is appropriate in that setting. We don't want to be fired! On the flip side, our emotional control seems to slip rather easily around close friends or family. Why do we feel it is ok to take out all those negative emotions on them? I know I have been guilty of this before. 

This talk was an excellent reminder of where anger comes from and that it is my responsibility to keep anger out of my words and actions. I'll leave with this quote from the talk, I love the analogy of a recipe for anger:

"The family is also Satan’s primary target. He is waging war on the family. One of his schemes is the subtle and cunning way he has of sneaking behind enemy lines and entering our very homes and lives. He damages and often destroys families within the walls of their own homes. His strategy is to stir up anger between family members. Satan is the “father of contention, and he stirreth up the hearts of men to contend with anger, one with another” (3 Ne. 11:29; emphasis added). The verb stir sounds like a recipe for disaster: Put tempers on medium heat, stir in a few choice words, and bring to a boil; continue stirring until thick; cool off; let feelings chill for several days; serve cold; lots of leftovers."