Getting to Know the In-Laws

This week, studying about the transition into marriage that brings along in-law relationships was really interesting for me. Having only been married for a little over five months myself, my relationships with my in-laws are still brand new. Building those relationships has really been a challenge for me. I am not good at building relationships through technology - phone calls and text messages and such - and my husband's family lives in Maryland. We live in Idaho. Hence my dilemma. I am a little envious of my husband's relationship with my family - they all live here in Rexburg or the surrounding area and Chris has gotten a lot of face-time with all of them. He isn't a stranger in my parent's home and interacts with my family very naturally. It has not been so easy for me. 

So, when in-laws came up as the topic this week I was excited to see what our material said about building those relationships. I really want to have strong relationships with my in-laws and do believe I can get there eventually, but it will require some stepping out of my comfort zone! For Christmas this year we are flying back east to celebrate the holiday with my husband's family and I am excited for the opportunity for some in-person interaction. I know, personally, I build relationships more easily that way. I have also been taking a class in Spanish this semester - my mother-in-law is Dominican and she does speak English really well but their whole family tends to switch in and out of both languages throughout all their conversations. Learning to speak Spanish has been a real challenge for me. I would not say that I am gifted with languages at all, but I think the hard work will pay off and help me feel more like part of the family!

Family Council

All semester family councils have continued to pop up in all of my classes that pertain to my major. Having a formal family council is not something I have really done regularly with my family growing up, although I do remember a few family meetings here and there. My husband and I have also not put into practice regular and formal family councils yet but the more this subject comes up and I have had to study it the more I feel that it is something I want to start doing and really believe it will be of benefit to us.

Family councils are a place to bring up topics of concern or other issues that need addressed, it is an opportunity to hear the opinions of all involved, and an opportunity to become closer as a family. I think that it is a great way to make all members of the family feel involved and on the same page with one another. In one of my classes it was mentioned that a family council is a way to keep everyone up to date with the different activities everyone is involved in.

A reason why I want to start holding formal family councils is to give my husband and I a more structured time to talk about and keep up to date with our budget, our plans for the week, and anything else that comes up. We still talk about those things now but there are times when we go longer without catching up in depth on the budget or something else and confusion happens. I feel like those discussions are best held when there is ample time to talk about it, and when we are both alert. Talking about finances while falling asleep late at night isn’t usually very productive.  

Different Family Councils:

https://www.cknscratch.com/family-time/ways-to-hold-family-councils

pic cred:https://www.lds.org/media-library/images/meme-ballard-councils-1709356?lang=eng&cid=pinterest-shared